Posts tagged ‘snacks’

Canadian Salty: Ketchup Chips

As we all know, a sugary snack is not the only snacking option. Sometimes instead of sweetness a hungry person feels in the mood for something salty. One of the most popular salty snacks is the potato chip.

(Who is this fine looking fella? Why, it’s Slim Chipley, just stopping by Canadian Fermentation to say ‘hello’.)

Chips come in a variety of flavours. The basic option is the ‘regular’ variety, which is a thin slab of potato fried or baked, and then salted with the salt of a thousand Salt Lakes. Regular chips are good, but not great. Most people who eat potato chips will eat regular chips, so it’s a good option to have available at parties, club meetings and satanic rituals.

(Ketchup chips usually come in red coloured packaging, connoting that ketchup chips are evil)

One flavouring of chip that you can’t find in America, but is readily available in Canada is the ketchup potato chip. This is a very Canadian treat. I can only surmise that the reason it isn’t sold in America is due to the undistinguished palate of the average American potato chip eater.

Now, you might be thinking something like, ‘Why can’t I just take a bottle of ketchup and a bag of regular chips and mix them together and make my own ketchup chips?”

The quick answer is, “You can!”

A slightly longer answer is, “It’s just not the same.”

Ketchup chips manufactured by snack-food conglomerates have a ketchupy flavour that isn’t exactly the same as the taste of ketchup from a bottle. Manufactured ketchup potato chips are very tasty in that addicting can’t-just-have-one-must-eat-the-whole-bag-or-I-might-die type of way.

Another reason not to make your own ketchup chips is to avoid excessive mess. If you pour a bottle of ketchup over regular potato chips you end up with a soggy mass of ketchup covered chips that you might as well eat with a spoon rather than your fingers.

Manufactured ketchup chips are easily accessible to the casual snacker and can be picked up between the fingers and the thumb with only minor mess considerations.

(This is what store-bought ketchup chips look like.)

(This is what happens when you make your own ketchup chips)

You can eat manufactured ketchup chips with equal ease whether you are jogging or sitting on your couch watching T.V. If you make your own ketchup chips it is not wise to go jogging with them, although you can eat them while watching T.V.

Summary: Ketchup chips, for good or for evil, are a naturally occurring Canadian snack that cannot be found in the United States. You can pour a bottle of ketchup over your regular chips, but you’ll end up looking like an idiot. Americans can buy ketchup chips in Canada and bring them back into America to snack upon or sell on the black market. Canadians can buy ketchup chips, much like they can buy weed or hookers, and eat or use them legally – at least in parts of Canada.

Enjoy your ketchup chips.

April 18, 2008 at 12:01 am 21 comments

Canadian Sweets

When I moved back from the States I went on a binge.  A sugar binge.

I regret nothing!

Canada has a surprising superiority when it comes to sweets.  Sure America may have kick ass Mexican food — although it’s quite possible Mexico makes better Mexican food — and Southern BBQ rocks my world, but there is nothing south of the border that beats Canadian based sugary snacks.  There are many snacks available in Canada, that were not an option while I was living in the U.S.

For example butter tarts.

Gooey sweetness in a crumbly pastry.  God himself would kill Mother Theressa for one of these.  When I moved back to Canada I ate a dozen a day.  Every day.  For months.   And then when I finally got out of the hospital I found the nearest bakery and had another one!  They are that good.

Next is a true Canadian treat, Nanimo Bars.

Nanaimo bars, not as good as butter tarts, are still something special.  Named after the city Nanaimo, British Columbia.  They are proud of their bars in Nanaimo — which has resulted in an unfortunate alcoholism problem.

On a more mass-market scale there is the line of Vachon Cakes.  My favorites are the Au Caramel cakes.   Vachon cakes can kick Hostess products sugary butts.  Three times.  Before breakfast.  And then three more times before brunch.

February 5, 2008 at 3:37 am 9 comments


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