Revisionist History (Part 2): The Players.

March 7, 2008 at 2:58 am 6 comments

This is the second part of a three part series. Please read Revisionist History: Cats and Confederation first, otherwise you won’t know what the hell is going on. I can’t guarantee that even if you read the first part you’ll know what’s going on, but you will have a better chance of figuring it out.

Ontario: John A. McDonald.

John A. McDonald would eventually become the chief architect of Confederation, and Canada’s first Prime Minister. A politician from birth he he became class president in the first grade and never looked back. He also liked alcohol. And parties. And alcohol. And hot chicks. It’s rumoured he was quite the ladies man.

He brought his cat, Pickles, to the meeting.

Nova Scotia: Charles Tupper.

Premier of Nova Scotia in 1864. In addition to being a politician and a doctor he was also a railroad fanatic, and pushed railroad building as a way to promote uniting the new country. His friends were constantly complaining that all he talked about were trains. “Did you see the new engine,” he would ask his friends? “How about that caboose? Pretty sweet, eh?” Eventually Charles Tupper lost all his friends.

He brought his cat, Salty Dog, to the meeting.

Quebec: Thomas D’Arcy McGee.

It’s difficult to tell from his name, but McGee emigrated to Canada from Ireland as a wee lad. He supported annexation of the British Territories by the United States and then changed his mind and pushed for confederation. He was also into whiskey drinking, leprechauns and stereotypes.

He brought his cat, Potato, to the meeting.

Newfoundland: Ambrose Shea.

A strong fighter for Newfoundland rights, he eventually became the Governor of the Bahamas. This isn’t as strange as it sounds as both Newfoundland and the Bahamas are islands. One is known as ‘The Rock’ the other is known as ‘Paradise’. See, no difference.

He brought his cat, Screech, to the meeting.

New Brunswick and Prince Edward Island: John Hamilton Grey.

John Hamilton Grey(s) is a/are mysterious figure(s): was he the same man representing two colonies, or two different men with the same name? Were they twins? Clones? It’s just all too mysterious! What is known, though, is that two individuals calling themselves John Hamilton Grey showed up at the meeting, each claiming to represent a different colony. They also brought two cats.

They/He brought, Puddles and Macinaw, to the meeting.

In part three I will share some excerpts from the meeting. It’s scary stuff, people, so be prepared!


Entry filed under: canadian, culture, history, humour, nationalism, politics. Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , .

Revisionist History: Cats and Confederation. Vintage Porn

6 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Amelie  |  March 10, 2008 at 1:34 am

    I think you need to do a whole history report on this video:

  • 2. paulmct  |  March 10, 2008 at 5:47 am

    So, old John A. liked pussy…

  • 3. C. Fraser  |  March 13, 2008 at 12:51 am

    Amelie: That’s hilarious! Thanks for posting the link…

    Paulmct: Lol of course he did. What founding father didn’t like pussy?

  • […] you haven’t already, I suggest you read Part 1 and Part 2 before proceeding, otherwise you will think that I’m critically insane, rather than just […]

  • 5. TheAgedCat  |  March 14, 2008 at 6:02 pm

    You ARE insane. But cats’ll have that effect on folks.

  • 6. C. Fraser  |  March 14, 2008 at 8:46 pm

    No argument!


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