Canadian Shock: Canada Under Attack From Inferior Nation
In an unbelievable turn of events a member of a nation that few believe actually exist has launched an unprovoked attack at the Canadian nation.
Alex, an Australian, from the infamous blog, The Discreet Charm Of The Middleclass, has initiated an unprovoked attack on Canadians. In a recent blog post Alex dared to claim that he could ‘take’ David Suzuki, as well as Canada as a whole.
“It’s unbelieveable,” responded some guy on the street who I talked to about the incident. “Does Australia even exist? It seems like such a ridiculous place that I can’t believe that it’s a real country. Kanagroos? Hahahahah…”
I concur, guy on the street, I concur.
Nonetheless, Alex continued by claiming that Canadians’ worst fear is carbon, and that due to this fear we won’t use pencils. This is an understandable insult coming from an Aussie, though, as it’s likely they haven’t yet acquired the technological know-how to use anything more advanced than pencils. Rumour has it that they’re getting pretty excited about the upcoming release of the Commodore 64.
Deciding to do some research into this ‘nation’ I pulled out an atlas to see where – if it really exists – Australia is located. It was difficult to find, but I managed to discover the geographical position of the country – it is just to the west of New Zealand, and so is sometimes known as The West Island: Things are becoming clear.
Next post: Join me as I delve further into the mystery that is ‘Australia’, particularly by answering the questions: Why do Australians constantly smell like kangaroo dung, and what is their obsession with toads? I will also look at why Canadian wildlife could kick the Australian wildlife’s ass in a street fight.
Disclaimer: Just in case there are people without a funny bone, I actually really like Australia and Australians. This is all in good fun. So feel free to get yours back.
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Entry filed under: canadian, humour, international, nationalism. Tags: australia, Canada, canadian, carbon, commodore 64, david suzuki, funny, humor, humour, international conflict, international relations, kangaroo, satire.